TIPS + TRICKS FOR THE COUPLE
The final gallery can only be dynamic and genuine with your help. These are preparation tips to help me capture the real emotion of the day authentically, without overthinking it.
I have also included some non-traditional touches you may or may not want to include in your day to make it extra special.
CEREMONY
The Basics
Hold hands. Staring at the Officiant, standing far apart, it doesn’t read as well as physical touch.
Know precisely where to stand. Make sure you are centered on the aisle. Mark the locations, or just be very aware of your position in relation to the aisle.
The First Kiss
The Officiant. Have a discussion with your Officiant BEFORE the ceremony regarding the first kiss. Request they step out of the way BEFORE announcing the kiss. Tell them before the ceremony, at the rehearsal, just be sure to tell them.
Make it a good kiss. Be dramatic. Be physical. A face grab, a dip, whatever you feel in the moment, or practiced. And make it last! The longer your kiss, the more opportunity I have to photography it. This goes for all moments throughout your day.
Round 2. Coming down the aisle as a married couple, you want to pause either mid-way or at the end of the aisle and do a second, preferably more dramatic kiss. Especially if you want the first to be more tame. This is a good way to capture not only you, but your guests as well. If you want to do a dip-kiss, practice in advance.
The Dip Kiss: There is a correct way to do this smoothly. You can search for a youtube video, or follow these directions. I will use “Bride” and “Groom” for this to be clear who the dipper and dipped are. But it is good for all couples, regardless of orientation. In this example, Bride is to the left of Groom coming down the aisle.
Bride, put the bouquet in your left hand.
Reach across and put your right hand on his shoulder. Keep your feet in place
Groom, put your left hand on her mid-lower back and dip her off to your left, her feet still off to your right.
Bride, drop your bouquet arm straight down.
Try not to pucker. Hold this position as long as possible. 10-20 seconds is ideal. The guests will cheer. It’s a fun time.
After, you can continue departing. But throw your hands in the air, celebrate, etc.
More things your officiant should include
Unplugged ceremony. Request for your officiant to make an unplugged ceremony announcement to guests. Signs don’t work on their own unfortunately, though you can also include one.
Look around at your loved ones. You can do this informally during your ceremony, or a nice touch is having the officiant work this into the ceremony. An announcement about taking a moment to look around at the people who are here celebrating your love. The people whose relationships shaped you, etc.
Next steps announcement. Have your officiant add the next steps to the end of your ceremony after you depart. Include an announcement for immediate family to stay, or go to X location for photos, and everyone else to cocktail hour. You don’t want to have to waste time searching for family at cocktail hour and pulling them away for photos.
Bouquet Tips
Dry the end of stems. If the end of the stems are exposed, you don’t want to get wet spots on the front of your dress.
Hold hands at belly button level. Tilt the top forward ever so slightly.
Q-tips. Have the bridesmaids put a few Q-tips in their bouquet. Have your Maid of Honor hold a few extra for you. And she should be ready to hand one off and take it back when she sees tears. To preserve your makeup, dab your tears, don’t wipe.
Take it all in
Immediate alone time. Go off to a designated, private location to take it all in together for a few minutes. Somewhere near the ceremony, but behind a door. Don’t watch your guests depart the ceremony. Take your private moment.
TIMELINE
Getting Ready
Bride does hair and makeup middle-ish in the lineup. Toward last, but not dead last. This is ideal for several reasons. If the bride goes dead last and they’re taking longer than anticipated, you never want the bride to have the rush job. Going first, or one of the first, it’s not as fresh going into the important parts of the day. It will also allow for me to do detail shots first, capture the end of bridal hair and makeup photos, and start the getting into the dress and final outfit touches with the super close family and bridal party members while the last one or two finish up. It also allows for us to head into the formal bridal portraits even if a few people are still finishing up.
**Mother of the bride, Maid of Honor and siblings should also be prioritized not to go last.
Scheduled Portraits
First looks. If you are planning to do a first look, give it 20 minutes and follow it up with a 30-45 minute window for bridal party photos before the ceremony. Get those out of the way so after the ceremony and family photos, we have plenty of time for some formal couple photos. You may even get to pop into cocktail hour this way. Don’t forget about the “travel” period of getting to and from. And build in a grace period so you aren’t rushing through your day.
Couple photos wont be all at once. I don’t want you to be pulled out of the real emotions of your day for too long. It shouldn’t feel like a photoshoot. Instead of doing a full couple’s session during your cocktail hour, I prefer to have a few shorter, scheduled times as described above. And a few times when I will pull you aside for a few quick photos when the perfect moment strikes. If we have access to an outdoor area, golden hour is a good time to plan for a 20-30 minute window for this. Or maybe theres a cool spot in the venue that would be nice to photograph at a specific time of day.
Limit your formal family photos. Prioritize the must have family photos you know you (or they) will want years down the line. Don’t stress about including a distant relative you barely know. It’s a tight window of time, and groups can be challenging and time consuming to wrangle to one location if they wander off.
ALTERNATIVES TO COMMON TRADITIONS
Walk Down The Aisle
Step into the aisle solo. Having someone walk you down the aisle is so special. HOWEVER, it’s a great photo op to step into the aisle alone. Another way to do this is to meet your escort mid-way. Walk alone for a stretch, and hug your person before continuing to the front.
First look with dad (or another escort). Do your first look with this special person in your life at the same time as everyone else. When the doors open and you walk into frame. Meet your escort mid-aisle walk, but they are seeing you for the first time in your dress. A really special and sentimental moment. I highly recommend including a second shooter to cover moments like this, as I will be toward the front of the ceremony space.
Have multiple escorts. Do you have multiple special people you want to walk you? Step into the open doors alone. Then have one person step into frame to do the first stretch and the next to do the final walk. Or, if the aisle is wide enough, walk solo and meet both escorts mid-way. This is your day. You do what you want!
First kiss direction. Have me photograph your first kiss from behind. This is a good option when a second photographer is there to capture the standard perspective. AND when there is plenty of space behind for me to back up out of the direct line of view of the second. This angle allows me to capture the crowds reaction to the first kiss. This would not be an option for a church service, tight space or a small “stage.
EACH of you take the walk. Typically one person walks down the aisle. Make it special and give both partners their moment. Each having their own entrance song and escort if desired. Wanna go SUPER alternative, walk together!
First Look Alternatives
First touch. Want a first look experience without ruining the big aisle moment? Do a first TOUCH instead. You will be positioned with a wall between you (I will help scout a good location for this). You can hold hands, have a chat, get the jitters out, make a special memory.
Write a letter, or schedule a call. Designate a person to exchange letters to read from each other before the ceremony. If you didn’t book a second shooter with me, this should be done consecutively, not simultaneously, so both parties can be photographed. If you are at different locations, make sure to plan for this in the designated time I will be with each party in the timeline. Make sure to let me know in advance so we can ensure this is executed properly.
Reception
Do “receiving” photos. Don’t want to do the traditional receiving line (church practice) or walk around to tables saying hi during dinner service? Have your guests come to you, and make it a photo op! As a couple, stand on the dance floor. Have the MC announce tables to come up for a greeting and a photo. Roll through all the tables, get your “thank you for coming, congrats, etc.” out of the way, and get some really fun photos that include everyone.
Skip the bouquet toss. You have a few alternative options for this. You can make a duplicate bouquet with faux florals. Instead of inviting the single ladies onto the dance floor, invite all the couples on for an anniversary dance. The MC will announce years married. “If you have been married for 5 years stay on the dance floor, 10, 20 and so on.” The last couple on the dance floor gets the bouquet. Celebrating the longest love story present in your life. You can alternatively have all the single men and women onto the floor for the toss. Or take the microphone and gift it to your mom or another special person in your life.
End of Night
Private last dance. If you’re planning a grand exit, have the guests exit the space in preparation for it. With ALL guests out of the reception space, have a private last dance.
Grand Sendoff
Confirm Your Plans Are Venue Approved
***If you are eloping in a natural environment, sparklers, confetti, flower petals, and other thrown options are not good options. Even if you pick up after, it does not follow proper Leave No Trace practices. Keep natural spaces natural.
Coordinators. Whatever you decide to do (sparklers, confetti, etc.), make sure there is a person, or ideally multiple people designated to coordinate guests on your behalf. It’s not easy organizing a large group, and it’s a one shot and done activity. If you don’t have a planner or day of coordinator, make sure a capable and willing person you trust can handle this.
Sparklers. You will want more than 1 person and they need to be well vetted on coordinating everyone. Everyone should be provided with at least 2 LONG sparklers, and they should light the second sparkler before the first goes out, and so on. Once a few are lit, have people help each other light their first sparkler to make it a quick process.
Photo op. Instead of a walk, have everyone get into more of a group, sparklers out toward you or confetti readied. Pose for the photo. Kiss, celebrate, make it dramatic. You only have one shot at this so make it count. I will announce directions rapid fire when the time comes.
Confetti. Guests will wait until you pose to throw. Use biodegradable or very large confetti (venue will give guidance on approved options).
Mess-free options. Have guests wave fabric. Same concept as the rest. Ideally on sticks of some kind like flags. Bubbles. Get a decent quality mix and wands. I promise, the little party favor versions wont create the effect you want.
Champagne spray. Practice opening a bottle if you’re not comfortable. If you want, you can pop it while holding a dinner napkin over the neck to keep the cork from flying. Hold your thumb over it and shake hard before letting go.